by Joe Manafo

I’ve been tempted on more than one occasion to ‘key’ someone’s car. With house key firmly pressed between thumb and index finger, I’ve been more than ready to drag it deeply starting from the front fender, across the doors and ending at the taillight. I’m making a statement. I want them to experience the hassle of calling their insurance company, trying to juggle the options of a new paint job, deductible costs, the potential of raised premiums, or (best case scenario) have them live with the scratch as it turns from shiny metal to rusty brown and ultimately creates an access point for full on corrosion.

Until now, I’ve resisted the temptation. Barely.

What would cause an upstanding citizen such as myself to go to such lengths?

An improperly parked automobile.

Well, I suppose that’s the external reason, but its what brews below, it’s the combination of factors that when compounded send me in a direction that is less than respectable.  If I had to diagnose my issue, it would boil down to the following triggers:

The Size Factor

Are cars, trucks and cross-overs getting bigger, or are parking spots getting smaller?

What is it about the general public that has auto manufacturers making oversized vehicles? Is it that we have more stuff to haul than we used to? Is it that we’re fatter than we once were? Or are we compensating for something else?

But maybe its not the cars after all. Perhaps it’s the malls and stores designing the shopping experience to begin meters outside the front doors. I can hear them now… “Let’s create tension in the parking lots. Let’s make the parking spots as small as possible, forcing people to squeeze in and make them feel like they just made it. Then we’ll  stretch the spots as far as the eye can see away from the doors. We’ll intentionally create a culture where people will fight for the best spot up close…A ‘get it before someone else does’ mentality…then they’ll be primed to bring that same angst into our stores, ready to grasp what is rightfully theirs before someone else does.”

The Ripple Effect

One improperly parked vehicle has the potential of disrupting an entire lot.

When one person parks too close to the line it presents a dilemma to their upcomming neighbour: Do I park so close to the improperly parked vehicle that I will have difficulty exiting my own, or do I push the limit on the opposite side creating the exact same problem?

Then there’s the people who feel the compulsion to deliberately take up two spots. A deliberate message is being sent here and it says I’m better than you, the rules don’t apply to me, and even if you wanted to stop me, you couldn’t.

In situations like these one can be left feeling powerless. What are the options? The damage is already done, and things won’t iron themselves out until after closing. And even then, with the next shopping day mere hours away, there is an excellent chance it will happen all over again.

The Alarm Medley

You’ve heard them before. A lone vehicle cycles through a variety pre-programmed sounds and sirens. Crying for help, the stationary vehicle is making a statement: Someone is in my space.  Or maybe its saying ‘Leave Me Alone.’ Either way, a violation of some kind has occurred, and everyone’s going to hear about it.

In my mind, these same triggers surface when a disciple of Jesus comes to terms with his or her own participation in the Kingdom’s Economy:

The Size Factor opens our eyes to the situation we find ourselves in, and calls us to align ourselves with the Kingdom’s imperative of stewardship. In addition, nature and nurture are put aside as one is confronted with who it is they are meant to be in a world that calls them to be something else.

The Ripple Effect begs the question of whether or not we will continue in a destructive pattern, or if we’ll attempt to redeem that same pattern. Even if its only one spot (home/friendship/neighbourhood/church/moment) at a time, the Kingdom’s Economy challenges us to play by a different set of rules.

The Alarm Medley hurts the most. It reveals that left to our own devices, the only time we become vocal is when our own space has been invaded. Potentially, all hell could be breaking loose around us, but as long as we’re not threatened, then all is well. The Kingdom’s Economy leads us to look beyond ourselves, and helps us understand that there’s more to our mission then just keeping ourselves safe and satisfied.

On more than one occasion these thoughts have rushed through my mind. Sometimes I’ve expressed my disapproval out-loud, other times I’ve mumbled expletives under my breath. As of late, however, my first instinct has not been to make a statement or to scrape through clear coat and paint, but to look back to see how I’ve parked.